Hey Jakey,

Here's a quick (yeah, right, when am I ever quick about anything...) rundown of the "interesting" things that have happened over the past week:

1: One knee in front of the other! You're crawling! Pfffft. So now we're in the midst of baby-proofing the house. That other kid that we know, who shall remain nameless (you know, the gigantic monster baby) is "pulling up" now. Wow. When his mom told me, I just kept quiet and nodded politely. Meow! We took you to your 6-month checkup this week, and you are in PERFECT health. Yeah, you're a tiny, tiny baby in the 10th percentile for your weight, and 25th percentile for length, but may I say, you're in the 145th percentile for cuteness! Grow, baby, grow!

2. Sigh... daddy got laid off again on Wednesday. Out of the blue. It was the last thing that either of us expected. So now he's a SAHD again, watching you, and I can get a lot more work done. This sucks. I told him if he wants to send out resumes to the Bay Area, that would be fine with me. I love living here, but I have two standing invites to decent jobs back there if we ever want to go back, and we'd be near his family. I hope it doesn't come to that, though.

3. Yesterday I got the voice mail from hell here at work. Let me see, what were her exact words... oh yeah... "Do the world a fucking favor and don't have anymore children, because the world is already full of stupid people!" Because she mentioned family, it made me feel really icky. Like I wanted to disinfect my phone, then throw it out the window. Ohhhh. That woman can go fuck off and die! Well, here, let me just say it: Her name is Jan Short, and she's a third-rate "singer" living here in Tahoe (she likes to compare herself to Bette Midler and Ella Fitzgerald; I personally would like to compare her to a slobbering, pus-covered wildebeest with ebola), and if anybody reading this ever has to make a choice between seeing her perform and yanking your own fingers out with a pair of pliers, I *highly* recommend starting with your pinky. Never ever again will she get free press out of me. She'll be lucky if I don't publish a huge anti-Jan diatribe in my paper.

4. Ken called this week and left a message saying he was going to be in Tahoe next week, and that we should get together. Aieeee! How in the world am I going to lose 650 lbs before next Saturday?!!?!? I haven't seen him in 12 years, and here I am, looking all post-partum-y and gross. Oh well, it'll be nice to see him and I hope I get to meet his new baby. He'll get to meet you, and you're so precious, maybe he won't notice how fat I got since I last saw him. Now I've got to call him back and see where he's going to be.

Be well, Jakey, and don't ever let idiots ruin your day. They're not worth it. Love you!