The last few months have been hectic. I'm trying to put a positive spin on it and not say they've been AWFULLY FUCKING MISERABLE. Mainly because I want you to grow up with some sense that work and working and being a member of the work force is not sheer hell and something to be avoided. But there you have it. I'm not happy.
What was presented to me as an opportunity for a pleasant sideways shift in the company has turned out to be the invitation to dwell on the lowest rung of hell. Suffice it to say that it's just lots and lots more work, and whereas I am used to working by myself and self-sufficiently for years now, I now have to work with a team, which has its good sides and bad. The hours are the worst of it. Most weekdays, I go in late morning-noonish, and am lucky to be home by 9. I also work Saturdays. Yes, if you do the math, that is six days a week, with more than a few days where you are both gone to school before I get up in the morning, and asleep when I get home at night.
That's really about all I can say about it, without going over the deep end and dissolving in a puddle. So I'll leave it at that. It's hard to complain to anybody, because so many of my friends are either unemployed or under-employed, or right there in the trenches with me. So poor me, suffering in silence, except those times late at night, on the road home, exhausted, when I sob uncontrollably.
A bright spot: I took the week off last week because I'm maxed out on my vacation hours and didn't want to start losing them. Not a lot of money to go anywhere, so I mostly just did what I've been meaning to do since you guys started school, which is attend your classes and see what the hell you two do all day. Plus you both had Halloween parties, so I helped out with those as well. The week went by much too quickly, and my to-do list for the week went largely ignored. But I got to spend oodles of time with you both and I think you began to remember who your momma is. Going back to work the next week was torture.
What did we do this weekend. Yesterday we went to what was billed in the paper as a "Day of the Dead Festival" at the Nevada State Museum. It was a nice excuse to re-visit the quaint museum, with its antique slot machine exhibit, the random collections of dolls, buttons, tea services and money-printing paraphernalia. But the festival itself took place in just a couple of different rooms, with storytelling and some kind of audio-visual presentation in one room and crafts in the other. Very little signage, which just SETS ME OFF, cuz as a designer, I think everything should have pretty signs and logos and graphical stories pasted on it. But I digress. We had a great time decorating sugar skulls, and piecing together little Day of the Dead dolls and making crepe-paper flowers. But where was the food? And the dancing? And people shouting YIP YIP YIP! The Channel 4 news crew drove up right as we were leaving the parking lot, and Jakob, media whore that you are, started crying because I didn't turn around and go back so that you could be on tv.
Today we saw the Megamind movie. Well, not before some total sturm und drang. Call it a teachable moment, call it tough love, call it "momma going batshit crazy on your asses." But Jakob, you were not listening to me as we pulled into the movie theater parking lot. In fact, you were NOT listening to me, and then laughing about not listening to me, and then teasing your sister. So I flipped a bitch and drove straight back out of the parking lot and back through town and then home, Wavy sobbing indignantly the entire time, and you making mad faces at me in the rearview mirror. First demanding that I turn around and go back, and then pleading and apologizing, then finally realizing that I was indeed not going to go back. We pulled into the driveway as I gave you an earful and made you feel terrible. Wavy was miserable, and for that, sweetie, I heartily apologize.
The only reason that we actually went back was because I myself really really wanted to see the movie, and because we were so early the first time that we pulled up to the theater that we actually had time for me to drive us all the way home to sit in the driveway for a bit, but still get us back to the movie on time. You both were perfectly behaved for the remainder of the day's errands and chores. Mostly.
So there ya have it. I couldn't possibly relate everything since the last time I blogged, but it's a start. Love you both, sleep tight.
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